Iván Pellicer: The Dream Of Tender Masculinity

Breaking the mold of traditional masculinity with vulnerability, softness, and radical honesty, Iván Pellicer has become one of the most desired names in the Spanish film industry in recent years. As seen through the lens of photographer Daniel Riera, a free spirit, true to his Aquarius nature and ever-evolving journey of self-discovery, Iván shares his reflections on societal expectations on masculinity, and the joy of erasing stereotypes and embracing tenderness.

Photographer Daniel Riera, Creative Direction Christian Ruess, Talents Iván Pellicer Interview Javier Zamora-Kalazich,  Styling Brais Vilasó, Wearing overall Carhartt, Headpiece Rose Bowl Flea Market, Words Tom Veréb Czibolya

How’s 2025 treating you so far?

Life is good! Although I’m going through a lot of changes right now. Many decisions to make. I’m moving into a new house, and that is super exciting but equally exhausting.

Trapped in the packing process and surrounded by boxes, kinda? Are you the keeper type or getting rid of everything?

Yes, something like that. I used to keep everything, little mementos I thought I’d treasure forever. But this time, I’m letting go of a lot. It feels good.

Erasing the past in a way?

No, not at all. Actually, most of the things are from good moments and not bad times. It’s just that I don’t want to feel somehow anchored to anything. I feel that I’m entering a new phase in my life, one in which I want to be lighter. It feels like a very positive change, though it always comes with bits of fear.

You know this second issue of Container Love is about identity. What comes to your mind when you hear the word?

Light, acceptance, sexuality.

Interesting. Can you tell us how it’s been, the process of discovering your identity?

I guess like many others… I was born and raised in El Palmar, Murcia, a region with a strong farming culture, therefore I grew up with a lot of molds and labels. If you didn’t fit into them, you risked feeling excluded or like you didn’t belong.

When I was 16, after my father had passed away, my mom and I moved to Madrid for the first time. At 18, I settled in the capital permanently. Being there, together with starting acting school, it was a bit of a cultural shock or major discovery. I was blown away as there were so many more possibilities to exist than the molds I knew before. So many ways to express yourself, to behave, to be. And I’m still in that process, literally every day, and I hope that journey never ends.

Bigger cities definitely offer more diversity, more spaces to explore your own expression. Do you recall any specific stereotypes or labels that you had to overcome during that process?

Yes, during acting school, my accent was a thing, for example. Coming from Murcia, we have a specific pronunciation that is very obvious to people when they hear it, and back then, I was ashamed of it. They told me that in order to work in TV or succeed, I would have to get rid of it, so I practiced and neutralized it. Funny enough, many years later, living in Madrid, I’ve met so many cool people from Murcia who carry their accent with so much style and pride that I’m in the process of reclaiming it. Probably also related to revisiting some of those roots that feel now a bit blurry and that I left behind when I came here.

How do you relate to your masculinity?

I think it is a mold I carry and that I feel like I’ve been fighting every day to fit in somehow, although I know it is wrong.

There is this inner voice telling you how a man “should” behave in manners, in relationships, in sex, in ambition, in life. So you try unconsciously to fit that mold, even when it goes against your nature. And honestly? It’s a real pain in the ass. I’m like… fuck that, why do I want to be or act this way if it’s not me?

So you kind of catch yourself behaving in ways that you disagree with? More like societal standards or expectations about “how to be a man”?

Definitely, and it’s not something exclusive about sexuality; it’s in everything. A few weeks ago, we had a conversation with a group of good friends where we asked, why are we acting like this toward each other? Why is there so much competition among us? It’s sad, because it’s like, dude, I love you, so why am I trying to outdo you? Or like in happy moments, instead of a hug or kiss, it’s a strong tap or a punch. That’s how some men express love. But when you realize you can behave differently and embrace tenderness, not as they taught you not to do so, you feel peace from it. It’s like dopamine to the brain.

Because, in general, tenderness in men could be perceived as weak?

I am certain that is not a weakness, but often people mistake it, and I think that sometimes I struggle to accept it in myself or to bring it out more often. Maybe it is because of the labels, or the job that I do. It’s sad that in the rush of life we forget to be tender.

And when does your tenderness come out more clearly?

Probably being with my dog, to be honest. She gives me so much, and I naturally give her back that love on a daily basis.

In your characters, you seem to embrace levels of vulnerability, tenderness, and queerness so naturally. How do you approach those roles versus the stereotype?

Oh, when I interpret a character, there is no inner voice questioning, holding me back, or going against the character’s essence. I never hesitate, and that includes all forms of expression. I don’t recall a moment of having second thoughts on doing something that could be perceived by others in a certain way. And it’s interesting because I know some actors who would have some second guesses, especially with queer characters, where the rooted masculinity tries to somehow fight back in a way. But we all learn in the process, and from every character we take something with us for our personal life.

If not an actor, what would have been?

Probably an electrician, I don’t know (laughs). Up to a few years ago, I always considered having a plan B, as acting is so unpredictable. But then something clicked in me, and I truly chose to live as an actor. I’m happy how it’s been going, and I hope it continues that way.

So, if you had to describe what acting gives you in one word?

Freedom.